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Let me preface this by
saying that I have a love for detail and therefore
this will most likely be a very long story not short
of any details, including some that may be particularly
gross and may also be quite disturbing. Just warning
you.
This birth story actually begins long before the
contractions started and long before the family,
friends, and midwife were called over. This birth
story actually begins when I decided to embark on
the tough journey of attempting a VBAC (vaginal
birth after cesarean). I started at the birthing
center that Katie worked at and also gave birth
to Nathaniel, however, I was told that if I had
gestational diabetes as I did with Audriella, I
would have to be released from their care. I was
then referred to a doctor in New Port Richey that
would allow me to have a VBAC even with diabetes
and I thought she was wonderful. I made the 30+
minute drive for each of my appointments to see
her. At 36 weeks, however, I was greeted at my regular
appointment with a letter stating that my doctor
had her rights revoked from the hospital and was
temporarily unable to deliver babies.
Being that I was a month away from due date, I was
forced to look at other options because it was possible
that she would not have the legal issues worked
out in time for me to give birth. In order to try
for a VBAC, I basically had two options; first,
I could go to Tampa General, either as a walk-in
and use the resident doctor or see if a particular
midwife practice would take me that late and use
them. My other option was to do a homebirth with
a midwife. I felt that going to the hospital as
a walk-in or a with a midwife group that I barely
had the chance to even meet would not give me as
much of a chance for a VBAC that I really wanted
so I talked with my husband and we decided that
a homebirth may be best. I met with the midwife
that Katie was training with and I really liked
her and felt comfortable going through with it.
At this point, may I interject my personal opinion
about the whole VBAC situation.....had I not done
research, had a best friend that was a huge advocate
for women's birthing rights, and talked with my
original doctor about the actual statistics of the
dangers of a VBAC, I would have been the same as
everyone else, believing what doctors and others
say about how dangerous a VBAC is and how necessary
cesareans are in certain "situations."
Lucky for me, I listened when someone showed me
the actual statistics and without sharing a bunch
of boring information, I will just tell you that
it is less than a 1% chance that your uterus would
rupture and much smaller percentage that this rupture
can cause death, that almost never happens. However,
if you talk with almost any doctor in this area,
they will tell you that once you have a c-section,
you will always have to have to a c-section because
of the dangers. Ok, I understand, from their view
point it is less of a hassle, more convenient, possibly
more lucrative, and even eliminates that less than
1% chance. But what I do not understand is why so
many people and so many doctors are so for women's
rights when it comes to abortion. We are talking
about a human life growing inside of a woman's body,
who, for whatever reason she may choose, wants to
terminate the life of this child and this is both
legal and even sometimes praised at the bravery
of the woman. If you are prolife, you are a crazy
consertive who doesn't believe that a woman should
do with her body (and baby) what she wants. Yet,
look at the trouble I went through just trying to
give birth to my child the way God designed my body.
Isn't this even more of a woman's right than abortion
is, abortion negatively affects another life 100%
of the time. This seems backwards and ridiculous
to me and I needed to interject my opinion there
because I think it is important and I appreciate
the midwives, doctors, and groups out there that
are trying to fight for these rights.
Now back to the birth story, I will quit with the
backstory and my personal opinions and start right
with the action. I had an appointment with my previous
doctor Monday afternoon once I hit 41.5 weeks to
have a sonogram and make sure everything looked
ok. Sonogram looked good, baby seemed happy, baby
was estimated to weigh approximately 8.5 pounds,
and I was 3-4cm dilated and ready to go. The doctor
said that I was ready for labor and so was the baby,
I just needed to start contractions which she suggested
castor oil. She told me to take 2oz of castor oil
this afternoon and that should bring on contractions
pretty quickly. I confirmed this with my midwife
and she said to take it in the morning so I had
a good night's rest, I was impatient and took it
that afternoon (she probably wasn't very happy about
that) and it worked fast! Castor oil is a laxative
so it affects your stomach which also stimulates
your uterus and starts contractions and that is
exactly what it did. Once I distingushed the stomach
pains from the contractions, they started coming
pretty regularly around 8:00pm.
I had Walter start timing them and noticed they
were coming about every three minutes. At this time,
they did not hurt but were just very noticeable.
By around 10:00pm, they were still coming every
few minutes, lasted about 30-45 seconds and were
becoming less manageable and more painful. Katie
decided to come over and around 11:00, we called
the midwife and my mom to come. At this point, the
contractions were strong and it honestly felt as
though the baby was coming out. I really thought
this may be one of those many home births that I
read about o n the internet where the midwife makes
it just in time to see the baby pop out. The appeal
of a home birth is that you are in your own natural
setting therefore are more relaxed and more calm,
allowing for a smoother birth experience. Of course,
that is exactly what I wanted. Katie suggested I
get in the tub to help with the contractions and
just in case I get ready to push, I will already
be there which is where my ideal place to give birth
was. I did and the contractions continued to get
stronger as the midwife, Rebecca and my mother arrived.
Later Ginese came as well and stayed for a little
while.
From this point on, I had no perception of time
and probably cannot recall every single detail and
the order in which they happened but I will try
my best to recall what I remember. The contractions
became significantly more painful, one after another,
barely giving me time in between. When there was
time in between, I rested, just as Rebecca told
me. I even fell asleep and had dreams during many
of my breaks. This both helped and hurt, it helped
because I was able to keep some of my energy up
but also hurt in the way that I was constantly being
awoken by a severely painful contraction which is
absolutely no way to be woken up. Those hurt a lot,
in fact, I remember being in the hospital with Audriella
and when contractions started from the pitocin,
the nurses kept asking my pain level on a scale
of 1-10, I never knew how to answer until now. I
now have a clear definition of the pain scale, what
I was experiencing was a 10, I had no doubt in my
mind (sorry, this is not the sugar coated version).
I may now compare any other pain I ever experience
to that day and have an exact number from the pain
scale.
From here, I continued to labor into the morning.
I stayed in the tub the entire time. Things seemed
to be progressing very slowly, I felt as though
I was in all this pain for no reason, nothing seemed
to be happening. The midwife offered to check me
and confirm that I was progressing, this was very
helpful, I was 10cm dilated and ready to push when
I felt the urge. That urge came pretty quickly after
that and even though I don't think they did much,
I pushed during some of the contractions. I did
not think I could do this any longer, it was hard,
painful, I was tired, and I really thought I had
nothing left. Unfortunately, this was only the beginning.
Walter and Katie continued taking turns sitting
by me and helping me when I needed it, they were
wonderful! Most of the time everyone just sat with
me and gave me what I needed, whether it be water,
their hand to squeeze, or just a quick word of encouragement
that I could do this. Every once in while Rebecca
would come and tell me I was doing great and that
I would soon be holding my baby girl in my arms.
She also checked the baby's heartrate, my blood
pressure, and pulse very regularly. The baby's heartrate
stayed strong the entire time, which was not the
case with Audriella and the reason for my c-section
so I was glad each time she said everything was
still great and the baby was happy. Soon after my
little practice pushes began, my water broke, even
though I was in the water, it was very noticeable.
Something was happening so I continued to push.
While I continued to cry and complain about how
hard it was, others were noticing that not much
was happening too. The midwife suggested that I
change positions since I had been sitting in the
tub the entire time. I told her I wanted to but
couldn't do it and every time I thought I would
try, I would have a bad contraction. It may seem
easy to simply move your body in a different position
but it certainly was not, I thought it was impossible.
She never forced me to do anything but finally Katie
told me sternly but gently that I really needed
to get in another position to help get her out.
I had help standing up in the tub and was told just
to start out squatting each time I needed to push,
that gravity really helped. I did this a few times
and hated it so it was then suggested that I lay
in bed to be more comfortable and allow myself to
rest in between contractions so that I would be
able to keep my energy up. Although I thought I
would be against this due to the disgusting mess
it would create on the place I slept each night,
I was all for anything at this point. My idea of
the most modest and clean birth possible had absolutely
no weight compared to my extreme desire to get this
child out of me.
The bed had already been prepped before anyone even
got there, Walter had added sheets, a plastic cover
over the whole bed, and then a set of old sheets
on top of that. Pillows were placed on the bed to
help me sit up and I laid on my side ready for more
pushing. The urge to push was so strong now that
I could not ignore it, I was forced to push with
every contraction. I continued to complain about
how I could no longer push and had nothing left
and everyone kept encouraging me and I somehow found
the strength to continue. This is when I consider
the real pushing started and at this point I think
it was around 9:00am. Lailynne was a stubborn little
thing and was not too interested in coming out (consider
her 41.5week gestation), she was also turned to
the side making things even more difficult.
Now the pushing involved me laying on my side with
one leg on the bed and the other basically straight
in the air. Walter had to hold my leg up because
when I put it down it would cancel out the progress
I had made during the pushing. That was not easy
for either of us. He was barely on the bed since
I was taking up almost the whole thing so he was
balancing staying on the bed and trying to keep
my leg up. When I pushed, he would have to pull
my leg back because my urge was to pull it down,
he said it was hard to do, that's how hard I was
pushing, that my 250 pound strong husband was having
a hard time holding my leg. I was literally giving
it everything I had. At this time, progress was
finally being made, she was starting to come out.
So I now had the contraction pain, the pushing pain,
and when she started coming out, there was this
ridiculous burning/pressure pain. Each time I pushed,
she would move and then go back in so I was encouraged
to take little puff breaths, keep my leg up, and
hold her there despite the burning. This was very
difficult but we were too close to give up now.
At one point during all of this (ok, several times)
I thought of what would happen if I literally could
not do it anymore. I was already too far along to
receive an epidural at the hospital and since she
was already coming out, a c-section probably was
not a possibility either. I felt that my only way
of getting out of this was death which certainly
seemed like a possibility but that wasn't an option
either so I had to keep going. This was what I had
been wanting so badly, right? Well God answered
my prayers and he allowed me to feel the full affect
of giving birth, sparing no detail, it was what
I had asked for.
After what seemed like 5 million pushes and everyone
telling me she's coming soon 5 million times, she
finally did start coming out. Her head was coming
with each push and I just needed to get those few
big pushes to get her head out of me and it would
be all over. The crazy thing was that I would get
her partially out and I would feel her moving, that
was so strange. She was still fighting it, repositioning
herself and trying to hop back in my uterus. That
was not happening, finally, after a couple of sets
of insane pushes, lots of olive oil, and a big tear,
her head was out! That was it, she was out, all
of my whining and complaining, all of the pain and
intensity, the burning, the yelling and screaming
had all produced this wonderful baby girl who I
would hold very soon.
I was thrilled to meet my baby girl, relieved that
it was over, and then suddenly scared to death when
I noticed that her entire body was purple and she
was neither crying nor moving. The next couple of
minutes seemed like an eternity as I watched Rebecca
turn my baby over and pat her back, suck out her
nose and throat, smack the bottom of her feet, turn
her over again and try everything to get this baby
to cry all while she was telling us it was ok, that
she would be ok. Walter and my mother were crying
and all I could do was pray over and over again
"Please God let her be ok." We were all
panicked. Finally, like magic her skin just turned
pink and she was breathing, soon after she started
crying, we were all so relieved and so happy. That
was the scariest moment of my life. Rebecca assured
me that she was ok and would not suffer brain damage
or any other negative affect of being deprived of
oxygen because she was receiving oxygen from the
chord. I thought all the contractions, all the pushing,
and all the pain was so difficult but nothing compared
to seeing my baby girl that way, I am so thankful
she came around.

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After
all of that, she was immediately given to
me for bonding and nursing time. She had no
diaper, no clothes, just a hat and wrapped
in a blanket. She nursed pretty quickly, took
a little bit for her to latch on but once
she did, she ate for about 20 minutes. I remember
having the hardest time with getting Audriella
to nurse for more than five minutes at a time
at first. Of course, I was super stressed
out about it then and this time, I was sitting
in my bed nursing my newborn and that was
very relaxing. Once she had a good feeding
and time for us to bond, she was then weighed
and checked out, we were so shocked that she
was over 10 pounds! I could tell she was big
but I was thinking 9 pounds, 10 was just insane,
no wonder she took so long to come out! She
was perfect, so she was cleaned up, dressed
and had time to bond with everyone else so
I could get cleaned up and dressed.
From then on everything was perfect, she
was perfect! I did have to get stitched up
because I tore pretty badly but that wasn't
too bad at all. I was now a successful VBAC
story and everything went well. It wasn't
quite the quick birth I was hoping for but
it ended up with a beautiful, healthy baby
girl and I was in charge, I didn't have to
do anything I didn't want to. I couldn't have
asked for anything more than a beautiful,
sweet baby girl. It was wonderful to immediately
be at home and relaxed instead of in an ugly
hospital, we couldn't be happier with our
little princess.
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